New and improved

Yeesh, it's been a while since I updated this blog. A whole crapload of stuff has happened since then. Where to start...

I got promoted to lead tester about two months ago. Pretty cool. High season was kinda busy for everyone (as usual) so my training was postponed a bit, but now that's done too. I haven't actually done much lead testery stuff yet, but I'm sure I will soon.

I also went back to Sweden for two weeks to clean out my apartment. I renewed my contract here for one more year. I had been subletting my apartment in Sweden, but now that I decided to stay here longer, I had to go back and get rid of it. The whole subletting stuff was a mess. Never sublet your apartment to a company. The amount of paperwork they insist on for every single thing is just ridiculous, and if it's a slightly unorganized company, the mess they can create with the paperwork is way, way, way beyond ridiculous. It's amazing how much you can screw things up if two people are in charge of something and they don't talk to eachother.
My parents drove down to Malmö to pick stuff up and help me clean out the place. We gave away most of the furniture to the salvation army store, and packed the rest into a trailer that they drove back home. It was really nice to see them. This was the first time I had been back to Sweden since I came here in June -06.

I've started taking guitar lessons again. I found out that a guy at work was actually a jazz guitar teacher. Feels great to be taking lessons again. I haven't really done that much with music since I graduated from college just before coming to Canada, other than written a bunch of songs. But compared to the more or less total immersion in music that I was used to back home, just writing songs every now and then is nowhere near enough to actually stay in practice. I've barely played the flute at all since I came here, and I haven't even looked at music theory. Now that I've started taking lessons again, I've really noticed just how out of practice I am.

In a way it's kind of depressing, I kind of feel like I'm wasting my talent and education by not playing more. I spent 16 years studying classical music, so not using it kind of makes everything I learned in those 16 years slowly fade away. On the other hand, it's gotten me thinking about it. Taking lessons again is kind of getting me back into the feel with music. Jazz guitar is very much about modes, scales and theory, learning about voicings and chord colorations. It's made me realize just how much I miss working with music.

I stopped playing just before I came here for a good reason, though. I was so fed up with the whole thing. Not because I was sick of the music itself, but because I was exhausted and fed up with the attitude towards music that we were force-fed with in college. There was always so much pressure on constantly achieving enormous loads of things, that I started to feel like I was made to achieve things for someone else's sake, instead of for the sake of improving my own musicianship. I do realize that when you're working as a musician, you're very often working for someone else, playing music that someone else wrote, etc. But it shouldn't be to the point where you start losing track of why you got into music in the first place. And at the same time, you're constantly being bashed with the idea that to play music well, you have to copy someone else who plays it well. If you're always made to hear something a certain way, eventually you start believing it. And I just refused to believe the idea that working with a creative art, it's more about copying others than actually creating something. I really needed to take a break from music, to digest everything and to get music and my own attitude towards music into perspective. And I think I've done that now. I feel like I'm ready to get back into it, and start making music again for the same reason that I got into music in the first place. Because I love it.

I've decided to take up practicing seriously again, and once I get my permanent residency, I'm going to start looking for music jobs. Working as a game tester is fun and all, but it's really not a job I see myself doing for the rest of my life. It's just not creative and challenging enough.

I'm a musician, and I'm going to create my own art.

Crankster

I'm having trouble understanding how the hell a real estate company that rents out apartments to several hundred people can be completely impossible to get a hold of. I've been trying to get a hold of my landlord for several weeks now. I've called them ridiculous amounts of times, and there's never anyone answering. They won't respond to emails either. What the hell is going on? Don't these people have anyone working in their office? I'm supposed to move out of my apartment in a month, and I can't fuckin' get a hold of anyone to arrange the whole thing. It's really starting to piss me off.

I got plane tickets now, at least. I'm landing in Copenhagen on august 12th, and flying back here on the 26th. This will be the first time I go home since I came here over a year ago. I'm looking forward to seeing my family and all my friends, but I'm not looking forward to trying to get everything done that I need to get done while I'm in Sweden. It's going to be a busy two weeks...

I've been working some overtime for the past two weeks. Nothing excessive yet, but I'm still getting pretty tired. The projects I've been working on lately haven't exactly been all that interesting, so I haven't really been a big fan of work lately. I've been yanked around from one project to another so much, sometimes up to four different projects a day, that I can't help but feel that there is no way the result of my work can be anything other than half-assed.

It has also been getting to me that some people seem to have this predefined image of me being some kind of anti-social recluse just because I usually don't talk much. I have no problems whatsoever communicating if there is something I need to communicate. I've done craploads of public speaking in various contexts, I've been in musicals and theatrical productions both as singer, actor and director, and done more concerts as a musician than I even remember. Believe me when I say that speaking up doesn't bother me in the least. I just don't talk much. Firstly because I'm at work to work. If I have something to do, I focus on what I'm doing. I get payed to insure that the quality of the software I'm testing is up to par, not to sit around and bullshit. Secondly, I see no need to talk if there is nothing I need to say or add to a conversation. I participate in conversations just as much as the next guy, but I do so by listening and reflecting on what's being said, not by opening my mouth.

I've been having this weird hay-feverish feeling for the past week or so, which is weird, since I've never had that past May before. Nikki told me that Ragweed is pollinating like mad right now. Hm... Have I aquired a new allergy? That would suck.
Bleeeeeh... I'm tired and cranky. I really should sleep more.

Tam tam

First of all, I put some more songs up on my myspace. Enjoy!
Recording is going well, but slowly. Since I play all instruments myself and only record one track at the time, recording one song usually takes me at least one full day. There's always the initial playing around with the tune to find the right arrangement, then a bunch of takes for each track to get things right... And I'm far from a great bass player, so it usually takes a while before I even get through the part without messing it up.

I went to the Tam-Tams in Montreal today. It was the perfect day for it, nice and sunny. I met some interesting people who did some cool poi spinning, and poied a whole lot myself. Fun times!

cold bass

I finally got my bass yesterday, at long last. However, Murphy's law immediately messed things up, as it often does. I got a huge head cold, so I've been home from work for two days now. Sucks ass. I've tried it out a little bit, it sound pretty good, but I'm too exhausted to really play the damn thing. Bleh... Well, lots of garlic, vitamins and icky blue liquid decongestant will hopefully get me back on my feet soon. I hate head colds. Always makes me feel like I've been hit by a train. Bleeeh... whine whine whine...

Myspace and bass

I got myself a stage name. My real name doesn't really work if I'm going to perform as a musician anywhere other than in Finland, since people can't pronounce my name. So after several pages of trial and error, I finally decided that I shall henceforth be known as Sam Rayne on stage. So, it's not the coolest name on the planet but hey, it's better than "Richard Blood-Eagle." And, it's also a name that is way harder to fuck up the pronunciation with than my real name.

I got myself a myspace page too at www.myspace.com/sammrayne. So far I only have one song on there, but as soon as I get my bass and get some serious recording done, I'll put up a few more songs.

The bass. Yeah. I ordered the stuff from Axe music, and let me tell you: Fast they ain't.
I ordered the stuff on May 26th and paid with my Visa card. Then on May 30th I got an email saying that it didn't work, because my Visa card isn't Canadian. So I went to the bank and paid with a direct transfer instead two days later, and called them the next day to let them know I had paid. Then I didn't hear anything from them until June 12th, when I got an email saying that one of the items I ordered was out of stock, but that because of a malfunction in their inventory system, it showed up as in stock when I ordered it. They offered to ship the other stuff ASAP and ship the out of stock item later for no extra charge. I took them up on that and wrote back the same day to let them know. They wrote me back right away and told me that the stuff would be shipped tomorrow. Some time went by, and I found it strange that I hadn't heard anything more, because according to their website, I was supposed to get a Purolator shipment tracking number when the shipment left the store. I finally got an email with the tracking number on June 27th. Tomorrow my ass... So now I'm just waiting for the shipment to get here. Hopefully it will arrive next week.